A Letter To The Girl Who Doesn’t Think She Is Enough

Deuteronomy 7:6 “The Lord your God has chosen you out of all the peoples on the face of the earth to be his…treasured possession.”

I know.

I know how you feel.

I know that sometimes you think you are ugly.

I know that sometimes you look in the mirror, and all you see is pimples and fat in all the wrong places.

I know that sometimes all you see is the things that you just can’t do right.

Sometimes, all you want is for that boy to tell you that you are cute.

But it isn’t all about looks either.

For just once, it would be great to get the best grades in the class, or for someone to acknowledge that you’re actually good at something…. anything…

& it sure wouldn’t hurt for your mom to tell you that she appreciated all the chores you are doing around the house.







It doesn’t even seem to matter who. You just want to be worth someone’s time.











Do any of those words sound familiar?

We let these lies, and ones like them, come leering into our ears.

They come first like a little whisper, and maybe we didn’t believe it at first. But after time, those whispers become all too familiar. As they grow louder and louder, we start to believe them more and more.

“Why am I so self-conscious?” …you ask yourself.

So you keep going like it doesn’t matter. You feel stupid thinking about yourself so often… so you don’t tell anyone.

You don’t know that everyone else feels the same way too.

Song of Solomon 4:7 “You are altogether beautiful, My darling; there is no flaw in you.”

I once believed those same lies too.

In fact, I grew up my whole life believing they were true. So, I went searching for the truth about myself…. I wanted someone to tell me that those whispers were lies.

Through that valiant effort, I was only met with confirmation that they were true…

Your nose is too big.

Your belly is 5x bigger than it should be.

You have the worst hair.

You stand out because you are so ugly.

You can’t say anything right. Everyone thinks you are stupid.

You’re an awful driver.

You’re SO. DUMB.

Everyone else is smarter than you.

You can’t sing.

You make bad decisions and you can’t help it.

You’ll never get any better. Your life is hopeless & worthless.

So every day I believed these things more. And more. And more. Until they became true and I could see nothing else. I was blinded by the ugly lies.

It all started because I was trying to seek out the truth of who I was. When all I received was more lies, I began to live like those lies were true. I was defeated.

I let people treat me any way they wanted… because I wasn’t worth it.

Somewhere along the way, I couldn’t do it anymore and I asked God to show me how he felt about me. After all, he made me… shouldn’t he have an opinion?!

Slowly, he began to rebuild my heart. He showed me the truth of who he made me to be.

He showed me that I didn’t need validation from men to tell me that I was worthy… in fact, it only made things worse. The only person I needed validation from was him.

I learned that yes, some of those lies had truth mixed in.

I’m not the greatest at math.

I can be a ditz.

My nose is rather pointy.

I’m not the skinniest person on the planet.

But I also learned that I am exactly who God made me to be, nothing more and nothing less. I also learned that it is possible to be perfect in his eyes.

Isaiah 43:4 “You are precious in my sight & honored & I LOVE YOU.”

Those things that I’m not exactly excellent at, those make me who I am.

Those things that I excel at… those also help make up the entirety of who I am.

Everyone is unique, and that’s something that sounds so cliche… until you look around.

Look at your friends. Look at your family. Look at the strangers going about their daily lives around you.

Every life is so precious. No one is our idea of “perfection”.

We all bring something different to the table, and that’s what makes everyone’s various strengths and weaknesses so wonderful.


Don’t rely on other people to tell you so.

It’s the truth, and you can always check in with the “big man” to ask for reassurance.

It was only when I stopped looking to boys to give me my confidence that I found my confidence in God.

And then God gave me the most wonderful boy in the world… and he treats me like I am precious. He sees me how God sees me.

Song of Solomon 8:4 “Swear to me, young women of Jerusalem, that you won’t awaken or arouse love until the proper time!”

Promise me something:

If anyone does not treat you like the most precious creature that God ever made, don’t let them take any part of your heart.

You are worth far more.

Ephesians 1:18 “I pray that your hearts will be flooded with light so that you can understand the confident hope he has given to those he called–his holy people who are his rich and glorious inheritance.”


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