In this culture we live in, there are so many opinions about what mothers should do; and it seems like no matter which way we choose to go we get looked down on for our decision by someone.
While I have nothing against working mothers (and I know it can be a tough decision to make), I personally feel like I have a really hard time justifying my decision to people – especially people of my generation.
No matter how much I say about the benefits of staying at home, there will always be that part of me that wonders if I’m really doing anything of worth over here. So, honestly, this post is as much for myself as it is for those reading it.
So the question is: what DO I do all day? Here’s just a little snippet of a regular weekday and what we get accomplished.
6:30 – I get up + get dressed + brush my teeth + take my meds + make coffee
6:45 – This is my set aside time for Jesus. I read my Bible, journal, pray, worship. Sometimes if my husband is still home we use this time to pray together and talk.
7:15 – Stretching/Workout
7:30 – My toddler wakes up. He brushes teeth + goes pee in the potty + gets dressed.
7:45 – Breakfast + vitamins for both of us
8:00 – I work on my blog for an hour while my son plays independently. He knows not to bother me during this time.
9:00 – Household projects (water plants + sweep/vacuum + dishes + fill ice cube trays and water pitcher + take out trash + do some laundry + pickup clutter + wipe down counters and table) + check out the calendar and make sure I have everything in place for our dinner plans
9:30 – This is the time slot when I do my “project” of the day. Each day involves something different:
- Sunday: We go to church from 9-12 in the morning and my husband and I lead the youth group from 5:30-8:30 Sunday evenings. Sunday afternoon’s are set aside for resting and being home as a family.
- Monday: This is the day I volunteer at a local crisis pregnancy center. My son goes to one of the Grandma’s for the day.
- Tuesday: I start out the day doing a quick “deeper” clean of the house to get tidied back up after the weekend. I devote nap time to doing meal planning and organizing the calendar for the week. I also babysit a little boy my son’s age for the afternoon.
- Wednesday: Today is grocery day! I also aim to do an art or sensory project with my son that day, fit in a bigger workout for myself, and I prepare my lessons to teach at our church’s kids club that evening.
- Thursday: I do some projects off my weekly and seasonal cleaning lists, focus on writing a new blog post or two, and our little friend from Tuesday comes to visit again for the day.
- Friday: I have a cleaning job I do on Friday mornings (I used to be a full time cleaning lady before I had our son!), then in the afternoon my “mentor” comes to hang out and talk. I also aim to finish up all the laundry and re-do my pedicure.
- Saturday: On the weekends, I try to stick to “no social media” to refresh my brain. Saturday I do my entire house deep clean and if have the time I’ll take a bath, moisturize/shave/exfoliate, do a face mask or hair mask. This is the day I try to rejuvenate and rest. I also help plan youth group and Sunday school lessons with my husband that we have to teach on Sunday.
12:00 – Lunch
12:30 – Do some more laundry + lunch/breakfast dishes
12:45 – Reading time w/ my son
1:30 – My son’s nap time. I use this time to take a nap myself, exercise, watch a tv show, read a book or do a project. Whatever I feel like I need that day without my kid.
3:00 – Small snack for both of us + outdoor play. If the weather is good, we will usually go on a walk to the park. If it’s really hot or really cold, we will either stay inside and play together or do something in the backyard for a little bit. I try to set aside this time to focus on being with my son.
4:00 – If I have anything else left to do from my “daily projects”, I usually do it in the later afternoon. If not, my son and I will keep playing or do an art/sensory project.
5:00 – I start to work on dinner and let my son watch tv. I try to limit his screen time to an hour a day max. If he seems to be in a good mood I won’t even mention tv and I’ll just let him play with his toys or go outside where I can see him from the kitchen window.
6:00 – Dinner
6:30 – Bath time for the toddler while one of us cleans up the kitchen.
7:00 – Family time. Sometimes we watch tv together, sometimes we snuggle and talk, sometimes we read books. Sometimes I use this time to be alone and take a bath or leave the house for a bit while my son plays with daddy.
8:00 – Our son goes to bed. We both get showers, if we haven’t already.
8:30 – My time with my husband.
10:00 – We go to bed.
I think the thing that makes being a stay at home mom the most different from being a “working” mom is that I don’t get a break. Personally, I think being a working mom would be much harder! Trying to focus on two different worlds every day and doing my best in both would be very difficult for me.
So, yes. I do love being at home and focusing all my attention on my little one and my husband and my home, but the thing that is the absolute hardest for me is that it never ends. I don’t really get a break during the day. In fact, I love doing the little snippets of volunteer work that I do on Sunday’s, Monday’s and Wednesday’s because it gives me a small break to just focus on someone else and doing another project for a while.
Some days I feel lazy because I get to nap while my child naps, or because I’m watching tv in the middle of the day. But the truth is that I need that little mental break before he starts jabbering in my ear again. He’s with me all of his waking hours and that’s a lot of work to be really honest. It takes some motivation, positivity and planning to really thrive as a stay at home mom.
Being a mother isn’t easy, no matter what way you spin it. But if you were ever wondering what the heck a stay at home mom does all day, this is it! Of course, every mother’s life is different. As soon as our second baby gets here or we start homeschooling, this will all change (and I’ll be happy to update it for you!). But here is a sneak peek of what I, as a stay at home mom to one toddler boy, does each day.
What is your best advice for other stay at home moms? What is your favorite part about being a stay at home mom?